Getting my head around things

It has been a tough few months for my little brain to get around, what with moving back to shared accommodation from the peace and tranquillity of my own place. However I have to look at the financial aspects of the whole thing as I have said many times in the past.
Things for me though seem to have become stagnant as I am neither moving forward or back and that has gotten me a bit frustrated over the past few weeks, so much that I had become in-tolerable around people close to me and came to realise this last night while sat there alone doing some thinking.
I am not sure on why this has happened or what the future holds in store for me but rest assured that I am not going to dwell on the point.

Now as we move forward towards Christmas, this is another time of great sadness thinking of my late father and all the good times we had together. I am going to try hard to get across to the UK to see my mum and spend some time at the grave-side of my dad on Christmas day and the other is to be able to catch up with relatives and old friends and of-course cannot forget that social aspect of going down the pub ;)

I'm back (kind of)

Jeepers, well it's been a while since I have tapped keys but the lappy is back in the land of the living JUST!.
Dear god where to begin or where to go from. Well it has been a confusing couple of months at least yet time is moving on and so am I in all my gracious beauty. It has not been easy by any respect but now have a window of opportunity open for a few month more at least. ;)

Life support

There is still life in the old dog yet but I think the days of my laptop are numbered :(
After much trying to revive my somewhat broken USB port I have finally got the machince back connected to the internet.
So for the past few days I have been on the PDA which has been so annoying as I cannot post here off that thing.

Anyway after my last post I have moved again back to the house I was in earlier this year and my padded cell :(
It was worth many sacrifices as I can afford things towards my transition now and not forking out on rent all the time. At least I have my own little privacy with the motorhome and the plus is that I don't get disturbed by any of the housemates as none of them talk to me.

Well it seems that like I have been taken for a ride again by friends as they all around here seem to give me a wide birth, even my own mother cannot be bothered to phone me these last couple of weeks and I sure as hell am not going to go chasing them.

Well lets hope and pray this thing can hold out for a little longer.


xxxx Katy

The good old times

I have been looking back through photos taken over the past 2 years and feeling somewhat sombre as to what I have achieved and realised it has been a lot but I am more alone and unhappy now than I was back then. I have decided that I m going to knock this on the head and go back to the life I had before. Well lets sleep on it anyway.

And there was me fretting

For the world is a strange place so it is.
One of the blogs I read here and one of the contributors to my well-being and sanity had her own situation whereby I could relate and offer kind sympathetic words. It brought back the time that I was in a similar situation with my late father (god rest his soul.) That sudden chill that runs down the spine of being told bad news is enough to make anybody crack. Well my thoughts and prayers go out tonight for the family and especially the father that makes this wonderful girl so happy and proud.
It is times like this when we all come together, as strangers pass like ships in the night, but I feel I have a few true and honest friends that I can honestly call friends.

It really was not that bad.

I had a surprise yesterday as I went off to collect my pension. What I thought was going to be disaster turned out to be ok and they did backdate my pay. The job front is still looking bleak but hey ho I am happy just to be here and by myself which with every day that passes I could never imagine it to be any other way.

This is where life gets all bad and I feel suicidal

It's been a start to one of those weeks where I could not fight my way out of a paper bag and little things have become to niggle me again. Well after the events of yesterday, the week has got progressively worse with the landlord coming around tonight to collect the rent and not having it until 2 weeks time.
Well things have changed within and felt a bit down for a while but have figured out what to do and how to go about it.
It would have been times like this that I would have gotten into a frenzy and panicked like hell
and wanted to have ended it all. Well now I am housebound with no work and no money but can be me.