Family is something I have rarely allowed myself to bond with & yet my thoughts were with my deceased parents yesterday, wishing I could spend just one more day with them.
My only surviving sibling is my brother & he was the reason from the outset that I desired the want to end my life.
He was simply a spoiled brat & a bully with the mental capacity of, well I couldn't compare as I wouldn't want to insult anything in that way.
Time passes & the optimistic nature in me hopes that one day he can change.
Needless to say that our communication this time lasted less than a week & once more I have this wave of feeling shit about myself.
I also wasted energy in drawing conclusions based on instinct, fact & reason to draw the conclusion that I would be better off if he never contacted me again.
My peace of mind has been taken these last few days & that is in the process of being restored once more.
Now is to relax & to try & enjoy the remnants of this Christmas. XXX
No comments:
Post a Comment