Nothing really exciting has happend recently except for a meeting today with my psychiatrist over my future & transition itself.
See I've been battling of late to see the relevant people to get me onto HRT & to move on with my life, & today was given the news that this is finally happening.
I should feel over the moon but I don't, I feel empty, hurt, emotional & fearful of my future with another dive into the unknown.
It seems that allnof the hatred of the past has caught up with me, the fear of moving on with a life that I've been denied for so long & the un-imaginable thoughts of being granted freedom for the future.
All this fear & thoughts has had it's toll on me & needless to say dark thoughts are running wild within. I expressed concerns at the time scale that I have to wait now for my appointments & follow up's to get my meds sorted. But in the back of my mind I really don't think it's going to be soon enough.
3 comments:
As I said on Facebook i'm really pleased. I can also understand everything that followed.
Lucy x
Thanks Lucy :o)
I really can't take much of the emotional outbursts but they do pass.
It gets better. The hormones help alot. Your transition is a time to build the strength of the new you from the inside.
Grasp onto whatever positive that you have so far and grow your self image from there.
I'm going down the same road that you are, I'm just a little bit ahead
Stay strong
Post a Comment